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Breaking: Computers Can Sense Tech Illiteracy, and They’re Judging You
Scientists made a groundbreaking revelation that surprised absolutely no one who has ever tried to explain the difference between “the Internet” and “Wi-Fi” to their parents,…
Breaking: Civil Unrest as Brits Realize That the Sky Is Blue After Rain Unexpectedly Stops
The United Kingdom fell in a global state of civil unrest yesterday as citizens were forced to confront a shocking revelation: the sky, as it turns…
Breaking: Man Cures Cancer by Posting ‘Thoughts and Prayers’ on Social Media
Experts have been left completely baffled as local hero Greg Jenkins reportedly achieved what was thought to be impossible: he eradicated cancer by sharing a heartfelt…
Guide: You’re Caring Too Much
For those of you who don’t know, caring is that delightful social affliction where you convince yourself that other people’s lives, feelings and opinions matter more…
Interview: Satan Is Proud of Mankind
Hell, January 2025 — In an exclusive interview conducted in the fiery depths of the Underworld, Lucifer – who, strangely, insisted to be called “Luce” –…
Breaking: Columbus Discovered the Americas After Being Told to ‘Get Lost’
Historians uncovered a groundbreaking twist as new evidence suggests that Christopher Columbus, the so-called “discoverer” of the Americas, didn’t set sail with lofty dreams of westwards…