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Interview: Man Explains How to Look Busy at Work Without Doing Anything
We had the rare pleasure of sitting down with Trevor Higgins, a man who’s somehow made a thriving career out of looking like he’s holding the…
Interview: White Man Doesn’t Believe in Systemic Racism
“Systemic racism? Come on, buddy. That’s just a buzzword,” begins 47 year-old Robert Brooks, who swears he’s cracked the code on what he calls “this modern…
Guide: You’re Being Very Undude
Alright, my nice marmot, if you’ve somehow stumbled upon this guide, chances are you’ve hit a fork in the road to chill. Your vibes? They’re off.…
Breaking: Man Meditates Once for 10 Minutes, Claims He’s the Buddha
Spiritual leaders are calling this “an unprecedented spiritual awakening.” Dylan Breeze, 29, has proclaimed himself the reincarnation of Buddha following a rigorous 10-minute meditation session that…
Breaking: Local Gym in Disarray After Lifter Squats in the Curl Rack
Planet Gains, 8:32 AM — A bizarre and unprecedented act of gym anarchy shook Planet Gains Fitness Center this morning after traveling bro Trevor Winslow committed…
Breaking: Bodybuilder Loses Gains After Walking Too Fast
A tragedy took the fitness world by surprise when local bodybuilder and Instagram sensation Bryce Hutchins reported a mysterious total loss of gains after attempting what…
