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Interview: Abducted by Aliens, They Brought Him Back Because He Was Annoying.
In what experts are calling the “most underwhelming alien abduction in history,” local man Trevor Dullard, 37, claims he was abducted by extraterrestrial beings last Thursday…
Interview: Study Participant Reports Death as Side-Effect from Medication
In a stunning revelation, local man Reginald “Reggie” Undergrove, 54, claims to have experienced what he describes as a “mild case of death” after participating in…
Breaking: Nation in Crisis as Carb Consumption Linked to Rampant Happiness
September 2024 – Nationwide Emergency Declared Over Unchecked Joy In the biggest public health crisis since the pandemic, the nation finds itself spiraling into chaos as…
Interview: Middle Manager Explains What She Does the Entire Day
The corporate world is shaking as Janet Henderson, a 36-year-old middle manager at Corpovista Solutions, has agreed to speak out about what she and her fellows…
Alcohol
Ah, alcohol! Some fun in a bottle. That divine fluid that turns boring accountants (and you) into Evel Knievel, that makes the ugly (and you) pretty,…
Screw Positive Thinking: Embrace Your Inner Pessimist
Let’s get one thing straight, my lovelies: positive thinking is overrated. Yeah, you heard me right. All those chirpy, sunshine-and-rainbows folks telling you to “just think…
