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Breaking: Lifting Weights Without Posting It on Instagram Considered Revolutionary
In a groundbreaking move that’s shaking the fitness world to its very core, local gym-goer Jessica Thornton has done the unthinkable: she lifted weights without posting…
Interview: God is Disappointed (and Kind of Over It)
In a rare and slightly awkward celestial press conference, God, the Almighty Creator, agreed to sit down for an exclusive interview to address His ongoing thoughts…
Interview: The Mosquito That Annoys You Specifically Speaks Up
The mosquito that has been specifically targeting you this summer has finally come forward to break its silence. Known as Jim, this bloodsucking annoyance sat down…
Interview: Man Farts Stomach Cramps Away
In a resounding relief that experts consider extremely rare, Bart Frown, a systems engineer from Windy, TX, achieved what the population considers to be the most…
Interview: Abducted by Aliens, They Brought Him Back Because He Was Annoying.
In what experts are calling the “most underwhelming alien abduction in history,” local man Trevor Dullard, 37, claims he was abducted by extraterrestrial beings last Thursday…
Interview: Study Participant Reports Death as Side-Effect from Medication
In a stunning revelation, local man Reginald “Reggie” Undergrove, 54, claims to have experienced what he describes as a “mild case of death” after participating in…
