Man in red shirt holding his face
Posted inGuide Lifestyle

Guide: Living with Anxiety

Welcome, you anxious disaster! If you’re reading this, it means you’ve officially given up on trying to fix yourself and have accepted that your life will be an endless loop of worrying about things that barely matter. Good, it’s about time you faced the facts: you’re a walking catastrophe with a mind like a hamster wheel of negativity, and there’s no way out. This guide right here is your ultimate survival kit for that pitiful…
Man holding a protein shake
Posted inBreaking News Lifestyle Sports & Fitness

Breaking: Bodybuilder Builds Muscle Without Protein

In a shocking turn of events that has left scientists, fitness gurus and your local gym bros scratching their heads, one bodybuilder has defied every rule in the book by building massive muscle — without consuming any protein whatsoever. Nate Flexington, a 28-year-old fitness enthusiast, has recently gone viral after claiming he has achieved his gargantuan physique with a diet entirely devoid of protein. That's right, zero gram of protein. Not whey, not eggs, not…
Blind man helped to read a book by woman
Posted inBreaking News Lifestyle Tech & Science

Breaking: Scientists Explain Why Men Can’t Find Anything on Their Own

In a groundbreaking study that has baffled researchers and confirmed the suspicions of women everywhere, scientists have finally cracked one of the universe’s most perplexing mysteries: why men, despite years of training and evolution, are completely incapable of finding anything on their own. The study has revealed a new phenomenon they’ve coined as “Male Pattern Blindness.” This condition apparently renders men physically unable to locate objects that are right in front of their faces. Lead…
Man passed out from drinking with friends
Posted inBreaking News Lifestyle

Breaking: Local Idiot Claims ‘Monkeys Are In Charge’ After Heavy Night Out

Liverpool, UK – The dire event has left the local pub’s early-morning crowd both amused and bewildered: local resident Gary "Gaz" Evans, 34, claims he has woken up on the set of Planet of the Apes "except it was real" after a “legendary” night out. Witnesses report that Gaz stumbled out of the local pub at approximately 10:12 p.m. after "more than a skinful" and an unsuccessful attempt to convince the bar staff that he…
Black wolf on green grass
Posted inInterview Lifestyle

Interview With a Sigma Male: The Lone Wolf Who Doesn’t Need Society but Will Explain It to You Anyway

In a world brimming with “alpha” this and “beta” that, one man stands apart - not above, mind you, just apart. Meet Chadley Steele, a self-proclaimed "Sigma Male" who, as he’s keen to remind us, operates on a plane so transcendent that society itself is irrelevant to his existence. Naturally, we had to hear from the man who thrives alone in the shadows, though apparently not too alone, given his robust presence on several internet…
Woman films gym partner exercising
Posted inBreaking News Health & Wellness Lifestyle

Breaking: Lifting Weights Without Posting It on Instagram Considered Revolutionary

In a groundbreaking move that's shaking the fitness world to its very core, local gym-goer Jessica Thornton has done the unthinkable: she lifted weights without posting it on Instagram. Fitness influencers and social media experts are calling this an unprecedented act of rebellion, a bold statement that could potentially spark a cultural shift in gyms around the world. Jessica, a 28-year-old marketing executive, completed an entire one-hour workout yesterday, consisting of squats, deadlifts and hip…
alcohol, liquor display in a bar
Posted inLifestyle

Alcohol

Ah, alcohol! Some fun in a bottle. That divine fluid that turns boring accountants (and you) into Evel Knievel, that makes the ugly (and you) pretty, the sad (and you) funny, that makes social interactions a little more bearable and generally makes life suck less. Mankind was smart and probably desperate enough to discover alcohol pretty soon in its history for all future generations to enjoy. Life 2.0 Because yes, alcohol enhances everything! Food? Better…
Child playing in front of a house crushed by a falling tree
Posted inLifestyle Personal Development

Screw Positive Thinking: Embrace Your Inner Pessimist

Let’s get one thing straight, my lovelies: positive thinking is overrated. Yeah, you heard me right. All those chirpy, sunshine-and-rainbows folks telling you to "just think positive" are the real menace to society. They’re like walking motivational posters, except worse, because they won’t shut up about it. Look, the world is a dumpster fire half the time, and if you're smart enough, you already know it. And still, here come the “positive thinkers,” waving their…
Old pictures spread on a table
Posted inEducation Lifestyle Personal Development

Back in the Days: A Nostalgic Rant

Ah, the good old days. The days when life made sense and we didn't have to worry about "Followers" or whatever the kids are calling it now. If you're old like me then you will understand, if you're not then buckle up because I'm about to take you down memory lane, and it's paved with suffering and character-building. Read also: You Aged Like Milk, So What? No Cell Phones - We Just Hollered Back in…
Man doing dumbbell bicep curl
Posted inBreaking News Lifestyle Sports & Fitness

Breaking: Bodybuilder Discovers New Muscle, Science Left Gobsmacked

In a groundbreaking development that has left both scientists and gym bros alike scratching their heads and flexing in the mirror, local bodybuilder Derek "The Tank" Johnson has discovered a new muscle previously unknown to mankind. The revelation, which took place during a particularly intense arm day at his local gym, has thrown the world of biology into chaos, with experts rushing to understand this muscular marvel. "It just sort of popped out, bro," said…