A tragedy took the fitness world by surprise when local bodybuilder and Instagram sensation Bryce Hutchins reported a mysterious total loss of gains after attempting what he called “a brisk walk.” The gym community is in shock as the 240-pound mass of muscle dwindled down to what one horrified witness called “a bloke that probably drinks kale smoothies.”
The Dangers of Speeding
Known for his unparalleled bench arch and for pressing your squat, Bryce felt a sudden urge to “up his cardio game” – a move that has always been universally considered “reckless” in the fitness community. Witnesses claim that the bodybuilder accelerated from his usual strut to a near-jog, which he admitted later was a colossal error. Within seconds, spectators noticed that his traps, once resembling two kettlebells, began to sink, and that his biceps appeared to retract into his sleeves, as if his shirt magically grew a size.
“I knew something was off when I felt a cool breeze where my pecs usually are,” Hutchins recalled, looking bewildered. “And then… they were just gone. My biceps, my quads, my delts! My prized delts! I looked down and I had… normal arms. Like some kind of librarian – which I’m not, by the way!” Witnesses report that the aftermath was nothing short of chilling. “One minute, he’s the Hulk, and then POOF, he’s just… Bryce but like… Smaller?” said Robert Benchford, a fellow gym bro, struggling to hold back tears. “I didn’t even recognize him without the lats. My man had wings!”
Science Explains the Phenomenon
According to Dr. Lance Veinhard, renowned movement scientist and pupil of the Brofessor Dom Mazzetti, Hutchins’ catastrophic de-gainzification was likely triggered by the combination of accelerated movement and the sheer bulk of his pre-workout shake. “When a bodybuilder attempts to move that fast without proper calibration, the body’s gains evaporate,” Veinhard explained gravely. “It’s science, plain and simple.” Dr. Veinhard is now warning about the possibility that this high-speed stroll also triggered a cascade effect. “There is a known correlation between muscle loss and strange dietary shifts,” he explained. “For someone like Bryce, who has focused on protein-rich foods for such a long time, this deflation could trigger an internal ‘plant-based re-calibration.’”
Hutchins has indeed reported facing a fresh horror: an inexplicable craving for leafy greens. The ex-bodybuilder, once famous for downing entire tubs of protein powder and slathering everything in peanut butter, has shocked his followers with reports of binging salad. Hutchins, still visibly shaken from the devastating walk-induced muscle disappearance, now finds himself grappling with bizarre new urges for what he calls “rabbit food.” In a statement released on Instagram, he wrote, “I don’t know what’s happening to me. I used to treat lettuce like a necessary evil, and now I can’t get the taste of kale out of my mind!”
Read also: Breaking: Bodybuilder Builds Muscle Without Protein
He’ll Be Back
In an emergency Instagram reel, the humbled Hutchins vowed to recover his gains, promising he wouldn’t stop bulking: “I declare my intention in this gym to be a bro, to be a meathead, to be respected as a beefcake, to be given the rights of a 1000-lbs club member again, in this gym, on this earth, in this day, which I intend to gain into existence by any means necessary.” Hutchins also committed to a total avoidance of anything resembling cardio, promised to ban the color green from all of his meals and is in discussions to launch a “Gains Have A Speed Limit” safety campaign to prevent further tragic losses of gains among the bodybuilding community.
While the fate of Hutchins’ once-massive quads remains uncertain, the tragedy serves as a grim reminder: in the world of gains, sometimes slow is fast.
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